Tuesday, May 31

Spend More, Expect Less?

OK, so I do all of the shopping I can get away with at thrift stores, and garage sales, but really? 

If you look forward to saving enough money to go shopping at Wal-Mart, maybe you shouldn't be spending part of that money on a stupid jar to put the money in.

Monday, May 30

Memorial Day 2011

It doesn't seem right take memorial day lightly, 

God bless you men and women who gave your lives that we might be free

I'll make fun of things again tomorrow

Saturday, May 28

Happy Tree Friends

As a rule I hate to buy things at thrift stores to re-sell on the internet, 
I usually don't get a great return on things I buy for that purpose, but over the next few weeks I'll share a few exceptions I've made, and you can watch with me as the items become valuable, or not... 

This week I was at the thrift store and I came across a very niche toy,

 This is Flippy
 He's called that for obvious reasons

 It's a toy from a show called "Happy Tree Friends" (I can't recommend the show) as far as I understand, flippy is one of the least disturbing charactures, 

anyway, I do have friends who enjoy the show, and knowing of it's relative obsucrity, I was shocked to find this toy in mint condition for a paltry 69 cents, a check on the interweb shows a recent eBay sale of an identical item:

$52! even including shipping, that would sure be nice, so lets all watch together with bated breath at my very similar auction:

check it out live here

Results next week!
Wish me luck, and if you or your friends are into the show, feel free to bid on it!

Friday, May 27

Rainy Day Recess

 I grew up (and live) in California, when I was in elementary school we had an outdoor campus,

it was a big deal when we had "rainy days"

(school was probably a living hell for teachers since they had to stay in the classrooms during all of their breaks and babysit)

I in contrast would practically run to school for the sheer joy of
"rainy-day recesses" blissfully unaware of their un-volunteered sacrifices

(that's right, my parents nearly always made my siblings and I walk to school, even when it was raining)

as an attempt to ward off our bad behavior caused by boredom, most teachers had a "rainy-day closet" full of games and educational toys,

I swear every one of my teachers had a copy of this, but since it was only released on rainy days it was one of the first things taken, no matter what grade I was in.

sometimes the teachers had the for thought to bring an innocuous video (usually a Disney one) from home, the really smart teachers kept a few in the classroom "just in case"
Robin Hood was a great option, there was one teacher that kept forgetting to bring anything else so we watched Mickey's Christmas Carol a couple times that year
If they didn't have any movies, most teachers would try to keep us interested/calm with a book

when all else failed, quiet "reading" with a personal book, though most kids picked activity books like magic eye books (I still don't get those) or look and find books
where's Waldo?
So teacher, thank you, even though you  blame the tension in the room on the weather, I don't blame you, I would hate to be on your side of the fence...

Thursday, May 26

Creepy Clown Quarter Finals

**Blogger account not required for voting, please vote**

Ladies and gentleman, boys and girls, it's coming close to the time you were all dreading, the time when we pit clown against clown in a massacre of grease paint and glitter


Our quarterly finalists are; in order of their previous wins:

Coming to get your children from the bottom of the toy box we have  


"would you like to play an incredibly intense game of go fish?"

And crawling up from under the bed while they sleep is 


"Santa's not the only one who sees you while you're sleeping"

Watching you from grandma's curio is  


"I've been here a long time, and I'm not going anywhere"

And finally, touching old and young alike, in that special way, is  


"I'm honored to be here, but I still only want to spend personal time with children"

For the quarterly winner, voting will be open for a full week, please vote before 9pm Wednesday June 1st"

Wednesday, May 25

Happy Towel Day

Listen. It's a tough universe. There's all sorts of people and things trying to do you, kill you, rip you off, everything. If you're going to survive out there, you've really got to know where your towel is.
Frankly my dear...

Keep it handy

Tuesday, May 24

Till' the Cows Come Home

I know I have my own eccentric collections, such as my board games or dishes, but something I just cannot understand is the "anything of a certain animal" such as cows-

 this brings new meaning to the term "milk maid"

here's a model from those who insist that the Trojans shouldn't have used a horse

than it could be humorous watching the soldiers get out

and perhaps the worst wedding cake topper of all time

that man really loves his wife

What do you collect?

Monday, May 23

Creepy Clown Figurine Results

Votes are in, and the clown nobody wants near their children is


better keep him away from your dogs too, just in case

Stay tuned for the quarterly Creepy Clown Showdown, where the creepiest clowns of the quarter go head to head!

Your Ugly Mug

It is of course the nature of all thrift store items to be badly thought out originally, today I'd like to focus on the ought to be humble - coffee mug

Precisely I'd like to ask what you were thinking when you gave these as gifts...

"I was at a crafts fair and I saw this mug that kinda looks like you, Happy Birthday"

I have eyebrows, you know

"Look a mug made for only sipping that looks like the Pringles guy, awesome!"

whenever I use it, I'll think of you
 How about, 
"I know you loved The Hunchback of Notre-Dame, so I bought you this mug that looks just like Frollo"

look he's happy

But without a doubt the thouht on this one is 
I'll give you this mug so you'll be too scared to!"

Drink up!

Saturday, May 21

Armed Forces Day

Last year my little brother did something I thought no one in our family would ever do, 

he joined the military

we are all very proud of him, and his decision, so, when applicable, I chose to dedicate all military holidays to him and his interests, starting with the porcine 

Here's to you Airman First Class Oinky
you've got your wings
 just remember, 

whether you're going out as a party animal

or you get stuck with KP

Don' t forget to wear your tie

Happy Armed Forces Day,

we salute you!

Friday, May 20

My 90's Childhood

It's not that I want to appear older than I am, I really don't care about that, (I'm 28) 

(I think childhood ends around age 16)

No... it's because the 80's get such a bad rap, and I like them so much that I don't like to admit that there were other formative years in my past, 

But since there were a few really great things in the 90's here are some that really influenced me (in a good way)

 Tiny Toons

Way back before everyone had cable, (in the days of the caveman) my siblings and I would rush to get our homework done (or perhaps lie and say it was) so we could watch Tiny Toons, it reached us in a way the old Loony Toons just couldn't, but mostly I credit it for introducing us to They Might Be Giants

 Saved By The Bell

Perhaps some of my siblings will deny it, but we would all also gather for Saved By The Bell, it was a terrible show, but a great portrait of 90's teen culture, and under all of that mediocre dialog were some captivating story lines, 
Don't deny it, I know you watched the "Wedding in Las Vegas" episode to see Zack and Kelly finally get married.

 The Animaniacs

Yet another example of a show that my brother, sister and I associated ourselves with individual characters, I didn't mind being Wacko, except that he burps so much...

and finally, a non-TV reference:

Ranger Rick

 Like all good little boy's and girls, we went every 6 months to the dentist, and most of the time to avoid the intense boredom of waiting for 2 hours to get through the whole family, we had 2 options "Highlights For Children" (which even as a child I found inane) and "Ranger Rick" magazine, if there weren't enough copies we would impatiently look at the lame mag while waiting for the others to finish, which took a while because it was the first magazine I read cover to cover.

Thursday, May 19

Creepy Clown Olympics Figurine Division

**Blogger Account not required for voting**

Welcome to the last division of the quarterly Creepy Clown Olympics, next week we will pick our quarterly finalist 

lets see who we've got this week-

 First up is Ned Norbels, who seems a bit put off by that doll behind him
golly gee,  I wish I hadn't been picked first

Next we have Kinko, who really needs to learn how to share

"Ahh my leg!!"

And better with dogs here is Gacy, who would juggle for us, if he could find the third ball
"I don't see what the last guy's problem is, so the dog bites your leg, big deal"

And last of all is Loofa who says it's not important if he wins, as long as he still gets plenty of time with the children.

"maybe this would work better if we sat a little closer"

OK, you know the drill, results on Monday,  followed by voting for the creepiest clown of the quarter.

Wednesday, May 18

CCO Porcelain Face Division Results

There weren't many votes this week for clowns, and I chose to blame that solely on  Blogger being down (CURSE YOU BLOGGER)

however the votes have been tallied, we never forget a face at the TATTS headquarters, but here is one we'd like to...

Congratulations Chuckles! 
You are the Creepiest Porcelin faced clown.

Lan Scheddes

So there's this "artist" we'll call her Lan Scheddes,  I honestly don't see why people like her work, 
(or how photographing children in animal costumes is original art, but that's another issue)

 The thing is, putting kids in Halloween costumes is cute,

putting a human head on a stuffed animal, that's creepy

it doesn't help that the dolls often look as though we just caught the last moments before the child is fully consumed

sadly they don't seem to make dolls of her children dressed as food series, it just makes me wonder, what kind of person would want to decorate their kitchens with strange naked babies sleeping on food? it happens

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